Notes from No where

All hail broke loose in Bakersfield yesterday. I was on my way home from work when I noticed the little white beebees bouncing of the hood of my car. We have been having the most bizarre weather. When I got home I found Paul in his kilt. He said his pants got wet and he didn’t have anything else to wear.

Paul went to the Scottish Festival last weekend with some friends and ate haggis. He said he liked it but it had a nasty after taste. (How do you like something with a nasty after taste?) Anyway, now he’s all excited about registering with one of the local clans, what with that 20 billionth percentage of Scottish blood he has and all. The next thing I know he’s going be hucking telephone poles around.

So, a couple of half naked PETA protestors showed up downtown yesterday sporting a sign reading “We’d rather bare skin that wear skin” and little else. Needless to say, they stopped traffic – cuz you know, no body here has ever seen a half naked woman before. Nobody. Ever. A few meat eaters also showed up to stage a counter protest. They wore nothing but a leather thong. (Okay, not really.) But they did have a crudely drawn sign with what appeared to be a cow with its head cut off, spewing blood. The sign read “Meat is delicious.” Just based on slogan and artistic merit alone, the meat eaters are clearly the winners in this debate.

If this post seems pointless and wandering it’s because it is. Let’s just say I’m distracted. Very, very distracted.