Actual conversations I had last night.

When I got home from work yesterday, Paul was waiting for me. He could hardly contain his excitement. He told me he and some of his friends had decided to start a blue grass band. But this wouldn’t be just any blue grass band; it’s going to be more like a blue grass, death metal fusion band. Then Paul explained to me that while the band played one of them would stand in the back screaming, “Deeeaaaatthhhh!” over and over. Sounds like fun.

Later, we went out to dinner. While we ate Paul pulled a rosary out of his pocket and informed me that he was thinking about becoming a Catholic. He said he went to St. Frances last Monday and asked if he could find out about being Catholic, but he was told to come back at 6:00 for a class and he never made it. When I asked him why he wanted to be Catholic he told me because it’s cool and besides, maybe he could be the pope someday. Then I told him he could not be the pope because I want grandchildren and he agreed to limit his Catholicism to basic participation. Given all the other things my son could be getting into at age 16, I’m thinking turning Catholic seems pretty harmless.

After dinner we went home and watched a movie. The movie was filmed in the Sahara desert and of course there were people on camels. Towards the end of the movie Paul looked at me and said, “I want a camel.” When I started to laugh he said he was serious and that really, really, REALLY wanted a camel. I told him it would probably be easier to get a lama, so he thought about that for a minute, and then agreed to settle on a lama.

Obviously I raised him right